BACK HOME

We drove back home and I was in complete disbelief at what I had just found out. I couldn't believe that I had a dead baby in my stomach. When I got home, I kept saying to my friend how I couldn't believe it and I felt like I didn't want to see the baby when I delivered him. I remember feeling like it wouldn't look like a real baby when he came out and I had no idea of what was ahead of me. We went to my mother-in-laws house where my other children were, I wanted to break the news to them myself. I was completley honest with them as to what had happened, but I think they were a little too young to really understand. My husband returned home late that night and he just held me when he saw me. I hardly managed to sleep that night and called my mom in another country and kept saying that I couldn't believe that I was carrying around a dead baby. My friend was still with me and I honestly don't know what I would have done without her...